I'm sitting at a Starbucks in Antioch CA, predominantly, because of the great air conditioning. It's been a rough week in sales. It seems as though there are seasons, like everything else in life. I'm trying my best to not solely rely on my own ability to gain wealth. Although I've been created to work, I have to acknowledge that I have to get set in a good place to accumulate that wealth. Hopefully the marketing department will get better and this season of little, will turn into much more.
I'm completely broke, if I'm honest. But I'm okay for the rest of the weekend. I have enough to get me through, and really I only say that out of faith. I barely have enough for this cup of coffee I'm drinking. I get payed on Monday, because direct deposit for my bank takes that long to get my funding into me (switching banks soon).
I had a rough night the other night in my hotel. I was overwhelmed with a sense of depression.
Depression: Severe despondency and dejection, accompanied by feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy
I take it that this sense of hopelessness had come out of my past. It's funny how so my years can pass and yet some wounds don't always fully heal. You carry them into the future, in hopes that one day, the pain will cease completely.
I miss home a lot. Today's a good friends birthday and I want to be home to celebrate with him. Fortunately when I get back, I can go to the sour fest, and enjoy being back home with family and friends. One more week before a break. I really need to retrain a little bit with my VP. And I really need to fellowship with my friends from Epikos. I believe I miss them the most.
Friday, June 14, 2013
Saturday, June 8, 2013
It's a Saturday and I'm sitting at Philz Coffee in downtown San Francisco. I've been wanting to start this blog for at least 4 months now. Just a journal of the traveling that I'm currently doing. The ups, the downs, the byways, and the roads.
People are pouring in and out of the door way, as I sit with my back to the entrance, listening to The Tallest Man On Earth. Lianna said that I should visit this place because she could see herself opening up a similar coffee shop. I agree that the drinks are good, but it's tiny in here and I'm just another paying customer.
As I drove through the city I turned on Jazz music. It just felt appropriate. The busy streets filled with people concerned about nothing outside of them selves, selfishly pushing their way through passers by, to get to where they needed to be on this gorgeous day in June. Maybe it's because I tend to observe everything, and I'm not from San Fransisco, that the discontent comes out in my writing. Or maybe it's my attempt to observe, and write. What ever the case may be, a simple excuse me doesn't seem to be too off-putting.
The traveling can get to you after a while.
What do you do with the hours spent in hotels? How do you get used to coming home for two days and leaving again? What impact can you have on someones life by sitting down with them for a quick bite or a cup of coffee? Is my not being home affecting others lives?
I miss my friends. Especially having coffee with people like Josh Cass, Clint, Keishaun, Seth, and Coral.
But I have to accept it. I know that this is only for a season in my life. Once I'm able to, I'll come back home, move up in the company, and be settled in an office, as I send out other people into the field. I'll know the places they're going to, the emotions they'll carry, and the way to coach them through certain situations.
People are pouring in and out of the door way, as I sit with my back to the entrance, listening to The Tallest Man On Earth. Lianna said that I should visit this place because she could see herself opening up a similar coffee shop. I agree that the drinks are good, but it's tiny in here and I'm just another paying customer.
As I drove through the city I turned on Jazz music. It just felt appropriate. The busy streets filled with people concerned about nothing outside of them selves, selfishly pushing their way through passers by, to get to where they needed to be on this gorgeous day in June. Maybe it's because I tend to observe everything, and I'm not from San Fransisco, that the discontent comes out in my writing. Or maybe it's my attempt to observe, and write. What ever the case may be, a simple excuse me doesn't seem to be too off-putting.
The traveling can get to you after a while.
What do you do with the hours spent in hotels? How do you get used to coming home for two days and leaving again? What impact can you have on someones life by sitting down with them for a quick bite or a cup of coffee? Is my not being home affecting others lives?
I miss my friends. Especially having coffee with people like Josh Cass, Clint, Keishaun, Seth, and Coral.
But I have to accept it. I know that this is only for a season in my life. Once I'm able to, I'll come back home, move up in the company, and be settled in an office, as I send out other people into the field. I'll know the places they're going to, the emotions they'll carry, and the way to coach them through certain situations.
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